Manifestations Of Youth.

If i am right, i do not need to be angry.
If i am wrong, i have no right to be angry.
Anger always comes from frustrated expectations.
And anyone who angers me conquers me
I am a fool if i cannot be angry; but I am a wise man if i choose not to be angry.
The best answer to anger is silence.
And so i shall diam diam.

One female voice sparkle though the joint today.

I was reminded of the days when i drink alone lavishing in my own ktv songs.

It was a dark and lonely period where my rebellious nature took me to.

It was a period of tough love indeed and how emotionally vulnerable human being can be.

许志安 - 烂泥
你最盛放的玫瑰
流芳百世
怎可瞬间枯萎
我愿意留低
舍身去垫底
任满天花瓣散落这污泥
我会为你躺下去
全身贴地
方使你企得起
化做了尘土
腐化中等你
甚至输出我养份
全部直至死
愿可做你
脚下那堆烂泥
来守护护你
我未理身上那污积
别轻视我
纵是这种烂泥
能滋润你
耗尽每分让你艳压一切
我暗地里等下去
宁可远望
不可对你触摸
眼泪也流干
让你可解渴
甚至输出我血液
无惧被刺死
愿可下世
再做这花下泥
来守护你
我愿意躺在最污积
别舍下我
纵是这种烂泥
能亲近你
纵被你踩在脚下也矜贵

I truly respect those fear factor participants after last weekend feat
Facing fear in its manifestation is a great mental barrier.
What was so big became so small after it was overcome;
And you are left wondering why something insignificant was permitted to hold oneself back.
This is a great boast before my Singapore Marathon Quarter Run next week.

There was only one woman who really f**ked me up down left right center.

Recently i have a appointment near her place. It took quite a bit of determination not to go over and take a glance at her window or even check if the family car still around.

While clearing up my junk mail, i came across our old email back then. Realized some aspect of me really did not changed over the years, like how i still hide in my cave when i encounter knotty issues.

We should really ought to read Dr John Gray’s works last time. Such an typical example of man from mars i was and vice versa for her. Then maybe we will not get so emotional last time until we resort to emailing to convey messages which result in further disputes.

Below is extract of her fierce mail;

I will only put things to an end if it is eating into me. I will not give a second thought about it if it is getting nowhere. Silence is golden, but too much silence is FATAL. It can simply murder all the things that has been built over whatever period of time. If you think that you prefer to keep things to yourself and hide in your own comfort zone without looking around at those who are there caring for, YOU ARE REALLY BEING TOO SELFISH. If that is the case, don’t even leave your door ajar, coz the other party is only authorized to gain access to part of your world (to make things worst, perhaps only a quarter access to it).

I really should learn from this precedent.

I dream of a wedding….

Recently my friends have been behaving very “P”

I always think there is a negative side effect of year end festive mood, the extreme hollowness that can hit one even though you might be cheering away in the middle of a party.

It is about how one can be lonely even though you are not alone and vice versa

In festive season like such, some people will stop and wonder why with all the 3-5 bonus payout in the pocket….Why does life still feel meaningless?

Yeah…that’s a real damm P blogsong for you P people…

Serious thrashing by the boss at work this week left me pretty devasted and a whole list of things-to-do.

Two discussions with different individuals this week about the cons of my ego problem left me with much reflections to do.

One drunken incident which left a bitter aftertaste with a friend which she declared she DL at me.

I am so requiring a break from this country to discard the emo me away.

Standing amidst the small drizzling rain, a stick was lit.

Staring at the bench, reminiscing the times sat there awaiting for drinks effects to be subdued enough for a safety drive back.

Sang,drink and bash the way thru Xmas and New Year just like a eye blink back.

Aching is my heart thou not here to do so with me this time round.

——————————————————————–

胡彦斌 - Waiting For You

金色的舞鞋 伴着音乐 BABY你的眼睛是一文深邃的湖水
而忽明忽灭 掩藏不可思议的美 让我晕眩 在悬崖边 谁知一睁眼就不见
Waiting For You I’m Waiting For You
Waiting For You Kiss Me At Tonight 为何你Cinderella
留给我一望无际的思念
Waiting For You I’m Waiting For You
Waiting For You Come Here To My Dream
牵着你不断旋转 一直到黑发变成了银线
Waiting For You Waiting For You 只到永远